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EsPutniX DaRcY Evangelion

Joined: 20 Jun 2007 Posts: 357 |-=‡‡=-|: 0
Location: Neverland, Landscape of Imagination, Alagaesia, Pern, Camelot, Pemberley Estate, Tartarus...
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Posted: 33e13 Ju8 20, 2007 8:36 p08 Post subject: EXTREMELY STUPID THINGS LAWYERS HAVE SAID!! |
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ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact? WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks?
ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual? WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard. ATTORNEY: Was this male or female? WITNESS: Guess.
ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of you autopsies have you perfomred on dead people? WITNESS: All of them. Would you like to rephrase your question?
ATTORNEY: ALL of your answers must be ORAL ok? What school did you go to? WITNESS: Oral.
ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body? WITNESS: Around 8:30 pm ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at that time? WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him.
ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood presure? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: So, then is it possible that the panient was alive when you began the autopsy? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: How can you be sure, Doctor? WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar. ATTORNEY: I see, but could the pantient have still been alive, nevertheless? WITNESS: Yes, it is possilbe that he could have been alive and practicing law.
ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory? WITNESS: I forgot. ATTERNY: You forgot? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning? WITNESS: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?" ATTERNY: And why does that bother you? WITNESS: My name is Susan!
ATTORNY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo? WITNESS: We both do ATTORNEY: Voodoo? WITNESS: We do. ATTORNEY: You do? WITNESS: Yes, voodoo.
ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know it until the next morning? WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-one-year-old, how old was he? WITNESS: uh, he's 21
ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken? WITNESS: Are you kidding me?
ATTORNEY: She had 3 children, right? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: How many were boys? WITNESS: None. ATTORNEY: Were there any girls? WITNESS: Are you kidding? Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a different attorney?
ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage termanated? WITNESS: By death. ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated? WITNESS: Now whose death do you suppose terminated it? MINE?
how do they get though law school?? _________________ espUtniX!!!
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Flowerling High Council

Joined: 19 Jun 2007 Posts: 701 |-=‡‡=-|: 0
Location: Bejewelled City
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Posted: 33e13 Ju8 20, 2007 8:36 p08 Post subject: |
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LOL! HAHAHA! Is this for real? So funneh XD. _________________ "Don't leave your heart unspoken." |
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Om3ga The Chosen One


Joined: 18 Jun 2007 Posts: 644 |-=‡‡=-|: 0
Location: *getting some cookies...xD
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Posted: 33e13 Ju8 20, 2007 8:36 p08 Post subject: |
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Hahahahahaha xD
Retards men...retards xD
Lol xD
Ah~
I think I'll take Law as my course xDDD _________________
♠ Zack Fair © Tetsuya Nomura • Signature/Graphic © Om3ga • Zack Fair Tribute ver. 2 ♠ |
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EsPutniX DaRcY Evangelion

Joined: 20 Jun 2007 Posts: 357 |-=‡‡=-|: 0
Location: Neverland, Landscape of Imagination, Alagaesia, Pern, Camelot, Pemberley Estate, Tartarus...
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Posted: 33e13 Ju8 20, 2007 8:36 p08 Post subject: |
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yah dude...
these are all totally true stupidities in court...
hehehe...
is law school that easy??? that even friggin idiots like them get through???
 _________________ espUtniX!!!
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vEa High Council

Joined: 18 Jun 2007 Posts: 709 |-=‡‡=-|: 0
Location: sa tabi-tabi
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Posted: 33e14 Ju8 20, 2007 8:36 p08 Post subject: |
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ahahahahah! very good very good.. matalino yng attorney n yn ah..
 _________________
.el baile es la vida. |
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EsPutniX DaRcY Evangelion

Joined: 20 Jun 2007 Posts: 357 |-=‡‡=-|: 0
Location: Neverland, Landscape of Imagination, Alagaesia, Pern, Camelot, Pemberley Estate, Tartarus...
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Posted: 33e14 Ju8 20, 2007 8:36 p08 Post subject: |
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wee...
sobrang talino grabe!!!
 _________________ espUtniX!!!
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xoxo_018 Fireblend

Joined: 03 Jul 2007 Posts: 70 |-=‡‡=-|: 0
Location: ..earth..
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Posted: 33e15 Ju8 20, 2007 8:36 p08 Post subject: |
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yess...
idOl!!..wOohOo!!..^^
ngekzs..!^^haha..  _________________ =======================
..yess..^^ |
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Mouse The Chosen One


Joined: 18 Jun 2007 Posts: 851 |-=‡‡=-|: 0
Location: Sa harap ng computer...
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Posted: 33e15 Ju8 20, 2007 8:36 p08 Post subject: |
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waw....
aba at last!!
a course na pedeng pede ako...
weeee weee wee xD _________________
Nid Help? www.jedi.yes |
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EsPutniX DaRcY Evangelion

Joined: 20 Jun 2007 Posts: 357 |-=‡‡=-|: 0
Location: Neverland, Landscape of Imagination, Alagaesia, Pern, Camelot, Pemberley Estate, Tartarus...
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Posted: 33e16 Ju8 20, 2007 8:36 p08 Post subject: |
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tara dude...!!!
wag na tayo mag mechA!!!
dito na lng tayo tapos sila ung gawin nating inspiration!!! _________________ espUtniX!!!
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cLarence High Council

Joined: 28 Jun 2007 Posts: 706 |-=‡‡=-|: 0
Location: heaven.... i hope....
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Posted: 33e19 Ju8 20, 2007 8:36 p08 Post subject: |
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where can we get these kind of lawyers...
i want 1...
ill let them face maam andrada...
wahahaha... _________________ i daNcE dEaL wiTh iT!!!...
my heart broke into pieces... tILl now i can't find them... |
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